Gold Affiliates Wanted!

My name is Owen Ceri Jones and I am a 52 year old Welshman from Barry, South Wales. I now live with my Thai wife, Neem, in the small village where she was born near Phichai, called Pragapee, in the province of Uttaradit in lower northern Thailand. Last year, we bought a semi-derelict, traditional Thai wooden bungalow on 400 m² of land in the middle of the village. It was too far gone to repair economically, so we spent the next nine months removing the timber and constructing a modern concrete dwelling.

I, personally, would have liked to modernize the timber house, but Neem wanted a 'modern concrete house', saying that wood is 'old fashioned'. A sign of the times here, I'm afraid, although there is method in her apparent madness. Timber houses have walls only twelve millimetres (half an inch) thick allowing insects to come and go as they please through the knot-holes and gaps - and boy-oh-boy, do Thai mosquitoes love foreigners! Furthermore, those traditional walls are not thick enough to take modem windows and doors. For example: my wife's mother has never lived in a house with glass - the openings have shutters instead. When I told people back home that Neem's mum has never lived in a house with glass, they jump to the wrong conclusion - that she can't afford glass. Not true! She is not well off, but traditional construction takes account of Thai weather and glass is not necessary. An interesting result of this was that when I took Neem back to Wales, she did not like looking out of the windows. Why? Because one moment her eyes would focus on the view outside and then her eyes would focus on the reflection back into the room and this gave her a headache. We, who are used to this phenomenon, 'filter out' the reflections and are unaffected.

Village life is very quiet compared with Barry, but then that is a town of about 50,000 people. It's easy to criticise the lack of entertainment here, but surely it is no different to the amount of entertainment provided by a village on the side of a Welsh mountain? There are no pubs, no restaurants, no hotels no discos or anything like that within walking distance, but ....., there are four or five shops, the owners of which have got used to me drinking a beer at the table outside their shops. In fact, they love it and look forward to me coming around for a beer. This is a year down the line; before they did use to think I was a little crazy - sitting in the evening sun, reading a book or old newspaper and drinking a beer alone. However, I am still asked the question regularly: "What? No friends today, Owen?".

Travellers like myself tend to be content with our own company. We have to be: one can go days without speaking English (or any other of the six languages I know) properly. However, Thais are definitely not like this by any stretch of the imagination: friends and family and constant social interaction are of paramount importance here. But, is that really too different from people anywhere? Probably not, eh?

Thai people still have something that British people lost a long time ago and that other Europeans are losing quickly - a sense of trust in their fellow man. For example:

• if you walk down the road whistling or singing in Wales, people automatically think you're probably a loony. And that's in 'The Land of Song'! Thais sing and whistle often, especially when they're happy. The trades people working in our house sing very often. Neem does too and I love it.

• if you say hello to someone you don't know, you're probably a loony. Thais do it every day.

• if you offer to help an old lady with her shopping bags, you're probably a thief and a loony. Thais still do it.

• if you talk to an unknown child, you're a paedophile and, by definition, a loony. It's encouraged in Thailand.

• if you say good morning to a much younger woman, you're a pervert and a loony for trying it. Here Thai women don't look at it like that - they are not ageist.

All of this is not only still possible in Thailand, but it is encouraged as good manners. I get more smiles per week here than I would in six months in Wales. I think it was Paul Robeson who sang: "It takes a worried man to sing a worried song". Well, I think that the converse is true as well - if you sing a happy song you are happy too. Does that mean that Welsh people (or the British in general) are not happy any more? I think it probably does, unfortunately. People seem not to pre-judge here - everyone seems to get a fair crack of the whip. (Just saying that in Wales would probably start people thinking that I'm a sadomasochist and a loony (only joking!)).

Having said all that, many very young Thais have never seen a 'farang' (their word for a Caucasian) face-to-face and some will burst into tears at first sight of me. OK, I'm 1.8 m (6') tall and weigh 110 kg (18 st.), but I don't have two heads and fangs! Usually their parents will then introduce their kids to me properly and, after I've proved I'm human, we invariably make friends. Older children will often wave as you or they pass and shout 'Welcome to Thailand' or "I love you". Welsh children would definitely not react the same to a visiting Asian.

Getting about is not easy unless one has the right frame of mind, as is so often the case when one lives or travels abroad. One must try to do what the locals do. When in Rome .. etc.. I can drive, but do not own a car and do not like driving anyway. In this area, most men are rice farmers and own a few acres, where they work every day as they get three crops a year. Most men go to work on their tractors or motorised trailers called 'Thailands'. This leaves the women to sort the kids out, shop and cook. Not many families have a car, so the women get about by motorcycle and will typically go to a nearby market almost every day. Sometimes I get a lift with the farmers or Neem borrows a motorcycle, but I always get out of the village once a week on the bus! Once a week, a bus comes through the village and the village ladies, the old men and me pile in for the highlight of the week - a trip to the market town of Phichai on market day (Tuesday). The bus arrives in the village at 7:30 AM and leaves Phichai at 10 AM for the 30 km round-trip price of 30 pence (UK). There's always a great atmosphere on the bus! But before you get the wrong idea, the women in our family don't allow me to go shopping with them - that would spoil their fun. They drop me off at the internet cafe and continue on their merry way. It is the nearest internet cafe to where I live and has broadband! A real luxury. I usually stay there for eight hours and get a taxi home later. Those eight hours cost me 30p an hour and the boss and his wife usually give me coffee or Pepsi and cakes or kebabs free. Where would that happen in Wales? I don't know.

Our house is finished now, although we don't have much furniture yet and I am having a satellite internet connection installed tomorrow meaning I won't have to go to Phichai every week. I know I'll miss it.

The language barrier can be a problem, but only if you let it. Neem and I are the only people in the village who speak English, yet I speak to dozens of people a day and my Thai is not good by any stretch of the imagination. In fact, I know only 35 of the 70-odd characters in the Thai alphabet, but you say what you can, nod, point and above all, smile and people can see that you're trying. So many people don't even try - it's embarrassing. Thais appreciate people trying to learn their language, but then that is the same everywhere I've ever been. I'm sorry to say it, but except for Wales, where I have heard from many English people that Welsh speakers were rude to them for trying - a national disgrace, if it's true. I am learning Thai though and now that the house is finished I am able to put more effort into it.

I first came to Thailand in 2004 and loved it from day one, although I did find Pattaya intimidating for a few days. It is so hectic and noisy there! I decided I wanted to stay here in that first month's holiday, but I went back to Wales to think it over. Six weeks later I was back and making plans to transfer my life over here. That process is just about complete and I am very happy here. I thought the weather might be a problem at first because the average temperature here is 30°c, but the fears proved unfounded. The human body is very adaptable, isn't it? I am very happy here in Thailand, although I do look forward to my annual trip to Wales to see my family and friends, but I have left the Land of Song for the Land of Smiles.

All the best,

Owen.

[Owen Jones is the webmaster of this site and author of the ebook 'How To Get A UK Visitor's Visa']